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What are the Most Common Signs of Spouse Abuse?

Nicole Madison
Nicole Madison
Nicole Madison
Nicole Madison

There are many signs that may indicate possible spouse abuse, and bruises and wounds are among the most obvious. In many cases, however, signs of spouse abuse are more subtle. For example, if one spouse seems abnormally timid or afraid of what the other spouse may think, say, or do, this can be a sign of spousal abuse. Likewise, if one spouse cannot make decisions for herself, does not have access to money or other resources, or seems isolated from friends and family, there may be reason to suspect possible abuse. Additionally, feeling as if one deserves poor treatment may also be a sign of spouse abuse.

Typically, the most obvious sign of spouse abuse is a physical wound or bruise. For example, a blackened eye or a bloody nose may be an easy-to-recognize sign of spousal abuse. In some cases, however, a person who is abused will not show such obvious signs. For instance, a person who is verbally or sexually abused may not show any outward physical signs of the abuse at all. Also, if an individual is physically abused, she may find ways to hide the signs.

A victim of domestic violence may be so in fear for their life that they believe it may be too dangerous to leave the relationship.
A victim of domestic violence may be so in fear for their life that they believe it may be too dangerous to leave the relationship.

Often, a person who is suffering from spousal abuse seems intimidated by or afraid of her spouse. For example, she may be hesitant to voice her opinion in his presence or to disagree with him. She may be afraid of displeasing him or of not behaving in the manner he expects. If something goes wrong, she may be afraid to tell him. Additionally, an individual who is a victim of spousal abuse may be afraid to tell others because she fears her abuser's anger; she may even feel too embarrassed to tell others.

The most obvious sign of spouse abuse is a physical wound or bruise.
The most obvious sign of spouse abuse is a physical wound or bruise.

When an individual seems totally dependent on her spouse, this may be a sign of spousal abuse as well. For example, if an individual cannot make decisions for herself, this may be a sign that she is abused. Likewise, the lack of access to resources may indicate possible abuse. For instance, if a spouse does not have access to money or is not permitted to drive a car, have a job, or maintain a bank account, this may be a sign of an abusive relationship.

A person suffering from spousal abuse often believe they deserve the treatment.
A person suffering from spousal abuse often believe they deserve the treatment.

Sometimes isolation can be a sign of spouse abuse as well. In many cases, an abuser attempts to isolate his victim. This may allow him to have more control over her. For example, he may interfere with and discourage her relationships with her friends and family members.

Interestingly, one of the signs of spousal abuse is how the victim perceives herself. In many cases, an abuser succeeds at making his victim feel worthless, stupid, or even ugly. As a result, the victim may come to believe that she deserves the abuse.

Nicole Madison
Nicole Madison

Nicole’s thirst for knowledge inspired her to become a WiseGEEK writer, and she focuses primarily on topics such as homeschooling, parenting, health, science, and business. When not writing or spending time with her four children, Nicole enjoys reading, camping, and going to the beach.

Learn more...
Nicole Madison
Nicole Madison

Nicole’s thirst for knowledge inspired her to become a WiseGEEK writer, and she focuses primarily on topics such as homeschooling, parenting, health, science, and business. When not writing or spending time with her four children, Nicole enjoys reading, camping, and going to the beach.

Learn more...

Discussion Comments

anon345190

I am for sure in this position. However, God will get you through like he has e. There is literally no way out for me right now. But I will get out through Christ who strengthens me.

anon296907

Sounds like my situation. This disorder is terrible and hard to cope with, I know. I would file for divorce and temporary alimony and get me life back. You can always take public transportation to go to doctors visits, shopping. Most cities have reduced-income housing and your rent is based on what your income is. If you have SSI, then you can get food stamps. Hang in there and hope you take your life back.

anon243624

My husband is bipolar and I have serious health problems. I can't get out on my own and he stopped me driving in case I had an accident.

I feel so suffocated. I am ending up doing nothing except sleeping all day. He is with me all the time. I am screaming for space.

He has no friends. He does not mean any harm and I am not afraid of him. I just can't stop crying to get my space. I stay up until 4 a.m. Please advise.

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    • A victim of domestic violence may be so in fear for their life that they believe it may be too dangerous to leave the relationship.
      By: LoloStock
      A victim of domestic violence may be so in fear for their life that they believe it may be too dangerous to leave the relationship.
    • The most obvious sign of spouse abuse is a physical wound or bruise.
      By: Dusan Kostic
      The most obvious sign of spouse abuse is a physical wound or bruise.
    • A person suffering from spousal abuse often believe they deserve the treatment.
      By: Warren Goldswain
      A person suffering from spousal abuse often believe they deserve the treatment.
    • A husband who is an emotional bully may intentionally humiliate his spouse in front of their children or others.
      By: DragonImages
      A husband who is an emotional bully may intentionally humiliate his spouse in front of their children or others.